MIDNIGHT MEDITATION No. 16
THE ADVOCACY FOR NOT BELIEVING FEELINGS
Everyone has experienced the phenomenon of deep resistance to get up from bed, only to find that once up, it was easier than anticipated, but despite this realization, the resistance continues to fool us. I was resisting writing this diary entry and I was ready to share some lyrics I’ve been writing because I was not in the mood to write something new, but I decided not to be a slave to the resistance and write.
As I’m writing this, this sentence currently, I’m feeling the resistance leaving my body, I am currently excited to write this diary entry and the words are freely coming out. Almost 10 minutes ago, I was dreading this exact moment, and it’s not like I wanted to do anything better, I just didn’t want to have to go through the initial mind maze.
So for this entry, I am advocating for challenging feelings and not taking them at face value. Separating sensation and thought has become a valuable meditative practice for me and it’s moment like this where I’m thankful for it’s benefits.
MIDNIGHT MEDITATION No. 15
THE ADVOCACY FOR AFFIRMATIONS
I like to consider the mind to be a sensitive place that deserves the utmost care. Emotions can get really heavy, and because they feel so overwhelming, it’s easy to forget that they are thoughts and imaginations translated into uncomfortable energy in the body. This discomfort often compels us to overthink, triggering a vicious cycle.
While I don’t like to censor myself from information, I do prioritize what occupies my mind. One way I do this is through affirmations. Sometimes, I repeat them in a very obvious, repetitive manner, while other times, it’s a simple mantra. The mind is inherently repetitive, so even if consciously doing repetitive affirmations feels crazy, our default state of mind has already surpassed “crazy.”
I am advocating for affirmations because they paint beautiful imagery in the mind and allows us to create desired narratives.
MIDNIGHT MEDITATION No. 14
THE ADVOCACY FOR MEDITATION
I started meditating around 10 years ago, but I learned about it a bit before that. I grew up in a Baptist church and I considered myself Christian for awhile, but I then decided to leave religion in high school, and that’s when I discovered eastern philosophies and it really resonated with me because it was more open-minded I felt as if it has “Proof”.
When I first learned about the idea of humans never living in the present moment and only living through their mind, that changed everything for me. From then on, as with every interest , I became obsessed. With meditation, you have the ability to live in the moment more often, worry less, have more control of thoughts that lead to action, and one of the most mind blowing experiences for me is the ability to simply observe yourself, and even the observer has an observer and it goes infinitely. It’s insane.
When I first started meditating, it was really uncomfortable, nothing was happening, but I’m always up for a self-challenge; I’m more hyper than still, so to sit in stillness for 30 minutes to an hour felt like I was conquering something. I started seeing legitimate results after a few years, the build-up was very gradual, but what I am experiencing now in my meditations are unexplainable.
I am advocating for meditation because MURLIN TV is built around meditation and I’m very curious to know how the human race would be like if meditation was a standard practice for all.
MIDNIGHT MEDITATION No. 13
THE ADVOCACY FOR UNNECESSARY SEX SCENES
Every now and then, I will go on Twitter or X and find someone complaining about sex scenes or nudity in a film, deeming them unnecessary. I like to imagine a future where a sex scene or nudity in a film is viewed in the same light as a mundane shot of nature or the everyday. However, because we’ve made nudity and sex taboo, reactions remain polarizing, no matter how they are presented.
Censorship does not work. People will find what they need because curiosity is strong, and you can’t censor the obvious for too long. It’s not just visual censorship; it’s embedded in our education, religions, and way of life. We’ve accepted it as the norm, along with all the consequences that come with censorship; The only solution often presented is even more censorship.
Addressing the problem at its root would bring uncomfortable conversations and situations to the table as a society. However, I believe the first step is to quit villainizing nudity and sex. I advocate for unnecessary sex scenes because I believe that if nudity and sex were presented nonchalantly in life, we’d have a healthier and more evolved approach to physical attraction and desire.
MIDNIGHT MEDITATION No. 12
THE ADVOCACY FOR FANTASY
For the longest time, I’ve always been accused of “living in a fantasy world” by others who deem themselves to live in “grounded reality.” However, I believe they are just as deep in a fantasy world as I am, but theirs is much more predictable and routine. Real life never made sense, and every day I am baffled by how we get on so nonchalantly.
Whenever I have a problem, I like to lurk through various groups and forums featuring a diverse range of people to see their perspectives. The solutions are always varied, but the one thing all groups have in common is their conviction. Of course, there will be a popular outlook; without it, we would not be able to survive together as a species. But I like to think that the idea of an “outlook” or “perception” is free. Behind every strong conviction or belief is pure nothingness. They are all susceptible to the death and rebirth cycle. Because of our nature and how creation works, our convictions solidify with time and consistency, but I believe this is a code that can be warped and recreated, moment by moment.
So, I am advocating for fantasy—not in the traditional sense, but as the creation of a fantasy that resonates with the self and not merely with the surrounding culture. There is nothing wrong with being conditioned by ideas, but because these ideas govern our everyday lives, it is wise to be aware of their endless possibilities for change.
MIDNIGHT MEDITATION No. 11
THE ADVOCACY FOR MUSCLE
There’s a cycle that comes when you are learning new things. First, you see the thing you want to learn, you’re super inspired by it and you want to know what it would be like if you could do it yourself, and dependent on how much you resonated with that thing, is how much you will sacrifice for it. In the beginning, it’s exciting because you’re still in the dream state of you mastering that thing, but that was a small mountain to climb until you see the 100 miles of flat land with pure uncertainty ahead. Thankfully, the road is not too empty, the destination rarely ever shows itself, but aid shows itself in many different ways, it’s just a matter of surrendering to the task. After a while, slow improvements come and go, more flat land and small mountain peaks follow, and then finally… The muscle is fully formed and activated, and once it’s activated, you are satisfied, but the feeling that you had when you first wanted it vs. having it is different. The satisfaction is pure and stable; not only have you gained muscle in a certain skill or subject, you gained a muscle in self-trust.
MIDNIGHT MEDITATION No. 10
THE ADVOCACY FOR LAUGHTER
Laughing is almost a default state for me; it is my favorite thing to do. No matter what happens in life, you can always find your way back to laughter. It’s a soft orgasm. Often, I laugh without reason, and though I think of reasons why you should laugh, you shouldn’t need a reason, you should just laugh. Everything is funny, all the time.
MIDNIGHT MEDITATION No. 9
THE ADVOCACY FOR D.I.Y
When I first started doing photography, I used to watch a lot of behind-the-scenes videos, and they were incredibly misleading. I felt like I needed the fanciest equipment, the largest teams, and so much more. At one point, especially when I was doing fashion photography, I did get all of that. However, when I worked on my own projects without a team, I appreciated the output a thousand times more.
People are usually shocked to see how minimally I work despite achieving a maximalist output. Everyday, I’m figuring out a system that is tailor-made for me. I look forward to having huge productions, but I am advocating for “D.I.Y” because I used to wonder why I’ve faced so many limitations, but it’s been those limitations that allowed me to create what I am creating now because when you are limited, you have to get creative.
MIDNIGHT MEDITATION No. 8
THE ADVOCACY FOR THE IMPOSSIBLE
I have a theory that if humans collectively decided to start cultivating the belief of “human flight”, we will be levitating or flying within the next few generations. One of my favorite things to do is read out-of-the-ordinary stories about people who go against all odds and heal themselves from life-altering injuries, or people who seamlessly move through life despite being seemingly limited; It’s a reminder that we don’t have to be so dependent on external factors. We yearn for control, but we often misplace our sense of control. To be human is to be a storyteller, and that is where our control lies.
As humans, we understand life from each other, and there’s a very loud group that lead us, but they are not the standard and there are outliers living wildly interesting lives and because of our limited perspective, we view it as “Impossible”. I am advocating for the impossible, but I am really advocating for a wider scope of possibilities.
MIDNIGHT MEDITATION No. 7
THE ADVOCACY FOR PERFORMANCE
In today’s age, there is a need for authenticity and showing your relatability. Now that media is decentralized, performance has taken a new form. While many believe they are rebelling against the idea of “Superficiality” in favor of the “Authentic”, I would argue that while “Authentic” content has it’s space as a means to keep us together as a community and share our various ways of living, it is also detrimental in the sense that whether the performer intends to or not, they are scripting a narrative that will not mirror their “Authentic” stance. This is not only for media, the same goes for real time as well. No matter how close you are to someone, you and that person alone have a special narrative that no one else share and more often than not, not even with each other.
I am advocating for performance because I’ve realized it is the default way of living. For me personally, I aim to be free with my script and narrative and give myself the freedom to be whoever I want at any second. Many of us are stuck in characters scripted by others and invisible societal expectations, but even though we are fated to role play, we also have the power to direct.